Reflections

"You should keep a journal of your first year" said one of my co-workers. Done and done. The strange thing is though, of all the years of teaching, from what I've heard, your first year is the most stressful, time-consuming, overwhelming experience of the profession. So with what little experience and insight I have I shall blog.

I have yet to share with you the craziness of the past month. I completed my first set of report cards which, regardless of what is supposed to happen they took me a weekend to complete. I really wish that I could tell parents that your kid is fine--an effective strategy for 75% of my students. For the rest I just want to tell them that we have a lot of work ahead of us, and ask "what's been going on for the past 10 years".

The end of the first trimester provided me with a lot of reflective time. I've decided to modify some things, analyze test scores and push my students more. I'm also still getting acclamated to being in this professional position. I'm fine acting like a professional, but going to work everyday is wearing on me.

I do have to say, however, I couldn't ask for a better collection of people to work with. I think being at a dual language school draws a diverse collection of staff members with such interesting experiences. Or maybe that's just Las Vegas. Vegas is a lot like college in that way--it's not out of the ordinary to ask where someone is from--usually they're not originally from Vegas. Not even my students, most of them are from California or Mexico.

A.S. was in rare form the other day. While teaching math, he decided to erase what I was writing. I told him to sit down and he started writing on the board. I really want Tom Cruise to come into my classroom. I think I can convince him that ADD is a real issue. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty granola (vegetarian, reusable shopping bags, etc) but if my kid has ADD he would be on meds faster than Tom Cruise can jump on a chair. In a classroom of 24 people having a kid with severe ADD is no different than having a kid with schizophrenia. Oh, wait, we shouldn't medicate that either....

In honor of Jo: "But they're not here now, so we don't think about them"

my list.

I decided to make a list of things that I learned this week. I got the idea while I was writing during our Writer's Workshop--a time when everyone in the classroom (me included!) writes for a period of time--I had a tough week and really needed to unload, it was surprisingly therapeutic.

• It is inevitable that I will receive a minimum of one paper cut per day (this was not mentioned to me before I started teaching)
• I currently have 7 paper cuts.
  
• No matter how exciting the lesson, it will always be lame to 5th graders.
• Principals miss teaching.
• I love my students, even the ones that drive me crazy.
• My enthusiasm for certain things may not always be shared by others.
• Biting off more than you can chew may lead to choking.
• My students do not like to answer questions.
• My students will do almost anything for Hot Cheetos.
• Hot Cheetos are disgusting.
• The DMV people in NV do not have a sense of humor.
• I am no longer a part of the "Stay up past 12AM" crowd.
• I am now a part of the "Sleeping in is getting up at 7AM" crowd.
• While money spent towards textbooks and field trips is important, spending a couple grand on a top-of-the-line copier will save the sanity of your staff. That is priceless.
• Getting the digits of a 10 yr old is creepy. (He volunteered them...I was merely the recipient)
  
• When the worst kid in class tells you he moved, you feel sad.
  
• When the worst kid in class tells you he moved, you feel relieved.
• When the worst kid in class tells you he moved, you question his truthfulness (c'mon, you're standing on our school property kid--you haven't withdrawn yet...)
• In Las Vegas, a cold front=clouds.
• Las Vegas + clouds = best sunsets EVER. (The kind you draw in 4th grade)
  
• In Las Vegas, when children see overcast sky they go crazy thinking it will rain. I didn't have the heart to tell them those are the wrong types of clouds.
• It's snowing in Minnesota. (I almost forgot what November weather is like....)
• I don't know if I'll get to use my sweaters this year.
• I'm a good teacher.
  

That last one I'm still coming to terms with. This post is called LearningLasVegas and I don't know that I've officially explained all that it means to me. Clearly it's a play on words--I'm learning about Las Vegas, I'm teaching in Las Vegas--but I think it's more about learning who I am away from that which is comfortable. From the community atmosphere of the Midwest, from Fall and humidity and seeing my family on a regular basis. It's become learning about what God wants from me, trusting that relationship and trusting that while I don't get to talk to my students about Him, that they will get to see a glimpse through me. This week I have been relearning my calling to education. Through that pain, there has been grace and hope that God has given me abilities suited for this position and this is where I'm supposed to be. For now.

A





P.S. These are the approximate colors that we are painting our apartment. The living room is a tan color, the kitchen a light green, the dining room a darker green, my bedroom a dusty blue. Sigh. I think we miss the Midwest. Or Valpo or both.

where I'm from

Where I'm From

I am from 'Oh yah' and 'fer sure'
From knee deep in snow on Halloween
and everything on a stick

I am from stick-to-your-ribs dinners
and black coffee after
From the whole family every Saturday
knocking elbows at the table

I am from life a little slower
a little nicer
I am from deep love and great freedom
my gift

(inspired by George Ella Lynn)

the perfect storm.

Every three weeks, a new group of students prepares to leave for vacation and a new group prepares to come back to school. Those transitions are, very apparently, difficult times. Last Thursday, the year-round school thing bit us all in the butt. It was the last day before students left for vacation, the last day before a long weekend for all, all the 5th grade teachers were sub-ed out for a workshop and the day of a full moon (scientifically proven by teachers and psychiatric clinics everywhere to turn people into crazies). Or as I refer to it, The Perfect Storm. Each classroom, even those with the best classroom management turned into a den of chaos students were sent to the office in droves and multiple students were sent home.

I keep trying to apologize for my student's behavior, but then I realized I can only control my behavior (which, ironically, is what I am constantly telling them...). So if my class decides to transform itself into the looney there is really only so much that I can do.

I fled to Phoenix. I prefer it here. They have coffee shops at which I can blog. It's pretty much like heaven.

A

as promised.

I here are more pictures. These are from when Thomas was here--we went to Red Rock Canyon and the Bellagio Fountains--the most opposite experiences Vegas has to offer.

This is the city as seen from Red Rock Canyon. Seriously more impressive in person.

This is why they call it Red Rock. Genius in action.

Thomas and me--self-portrait (Thomas took charge of this one, thankfully)

The Bellagio, er, Fountains. Pre-fountainness.

This was a cool accident down on the Strip.

Back at Red Rock--Hey Valpo! Check it out, Sand Dunes in Vegas.

A really nice couple took our picture and they didn't even take our camera, golly!

I'm thinking about contacting Pontiac with this picture--my little Sweet Tomato (that's what I'm calling her)

This is my classroom before the students got into it too much. It's changed already to groups of four. We're making it work.

and so it goes.

The visit with Tyler and Thomas was really fun. I have pictures to post, but clearly you'll have to wait as my timeliness is not a skill I excel at yet. Tyler, Karen, Ben and I went on another hike to Mount Charleston which I think is Vegas' redeeming quality. Thomas and I went to Red Rock which is a hike for people who don't like to hike. No hills, just pretty.

Thomas' surprise was that Karen and I got tickets to go see the Producers. That was fun, I didn't really like the show (Tony Danza should quickly end his singing career) but I do like the people I went with.

School, needless to say, has consumed my life. I am annoyed by that fact although I anticipated it. I just feel like I don't have enough time for me or any other relationships. So today I'm making time for some and not thinking about school, well, except to blog about it(?). I failed. Oh well. I also read a book today, "The 7 Secrets of Teaching" (or something like that, it's on the other couch and I'm not about to get up to look at it). Overall, it was really helpful and informative but mostly I enjoy telling people that I read an entire book today. I think that's neat. It's makes me feel terribly productive and intelligent even though it really means nothing in the grand scheme of things.

I think one of the biggest lessons that I've learned over the past three months is that while you are starting your first year of teaching you need to cling to the successes in you life and forgive yourself for your failures. There will be both, but understand the difference between the two and using them to improve your teaching will keep you from frustration and burn out. Well, that and taking Midol at appropriate times. (That might be another story...)

Late September and October are the best months to be in Vegas (I'm sure March, April and May will be similar). The temps have stayed a pleasant 75-85 degrees with a good cool down at night. We don't have our AC on because it's such a dry heat, it stays really comfortable (and even a tiny bit chilly a night so you can really snuggle in your comforter). If you ever decide to take a trip to Vegas, definitely do it in the Fall.

Time to do laundry....the fun never stops here!

A

my collection of mice

So I really thought when I created this blog that I would be updating it often. I don't know what I came over me, I've never maintained something like this with great voracity. Alas, the first week has come and gone and I am approaching the close of the second week.

We are getting there. The first week didn't go quite as well as I wanted. My class is awesome--most of my students are very quiet, a third are ELL and the other's are simply fantastic. I'm really excited to get to know their personalities more as the year progresses. I do have one little stinker who is causing me a lot of grief. He (I'll call him A.S.) came to my class with a belligerent attitude and hasn't stopped talking back to me. I'm doing my best and have a lot of support from my colleagues, but the principal and A.P. have already had a formal meeting with his mother about his behavior. He's been down right nasty to the school crossing guard and nearly incited a riot in lunch the other day. Needless to say, A.S. came to me like this, on the first day of school.

More than disrupting my class (which is a huge concern!) I am worried about A.S. There is something inside him that is causing him to act this way. I wish that I could help to fix it, but I really feel as though this one is out of my hands. There are my child psych tendencies. So now A.S. is back at school (after his momentary suspension) and we will work together to find something that he can get excited about. Pray for him and me!

I am slowly getting into managing a class on my own, writing lesson plans, keeping track of students' schedules, my own schedule, standards and a pile of papers. It only took me 6 or 7 hours to write lesson plans for the week....I'm improving? I sure hope.

This first year teacher thing is kind of a nightmare. Eventually you'll wake up and it's over, but in the meanwhile you have to pretend you really know what you're doing. I like what my teacher mentor said, "you're trying to figure out how to teach while figuring out how to manage a classroom. You just can't do both at the same time yet. You'll get there...." So I am here waiting until I get there.

In the meantime--my principal was in twice this week to do observations. TWICE. I didn't particularly enjoy either, but it's getting easier. I just get so intimidated by him, and for no reason. He wants me to do well and I want me to do well, I just wish we could ignore the parts that I don't do well. Hmmm think of the possibilities.


Thomas comes tomorrow! Yay--special times ahead. (I can't tell you yet, Thomas wants it to be a surprise).

Sleep now
A

big news

I almost forgot--

6 days until Tyler comes to visit

12 days until Thomas comes to visit

this month brought to you by the letter "T".


A

Only in Vegas

I met a male model. He's also the pastor of a local church.

He's a pastor before he's a model, which is cool because he's convicted to minister to those who aren't actually pursuing a relationship with God. The guys he works with receive more than a formidable companion, but someone who is genuinely interested in their story and cool with exactly where they are at.

I hope to do that.


So, tomorrow is the first day that I will meet my students. I am SO anxious to put their names with their faces. Mostly, I am really nervous about how the day will go down. There is so much emphasis and importance encapsulating the first day/week that I'm fearful of failing. Fixing any problems or shortcomings from these next two weeks would be an uphill battle.

Wish me luck.

For now I have to focus on finalizing my plans for tomorrow. I have 25 little dears that will be gracing my with their presence and I refuse to disappoint.

A

planning.

The students arrived, went to special, came back. We spent some time developing classroom rules talked about expectations and then I stared at them. They stared back. I realized that I forgot to run of some copies of things for lessons that afternoon. So I attempted to go to my fall back--Read Aloud, but as I scanned the room and my desk but I couldn't find my book, or any books for that matter. Nothing. (Which is odd because I just recently loaded up a bookshelf with books...) Finally, I just panicked and nearly started to cry.

Then I woke up.

Now, I plan. I shall plan my little heart out. There is so much pressure surrounding the first day and weeks of school that I am getting nervous. Hopefully these kids are as psyched for school as I am (right!)

A

Labor Day: a day on, not a day off.

Michelle came up from Phoenix to spend the weekend with me . I had to do some quick thinking because I don't know enough of the city yet to really show it off. Then again Vegas kind of shows itself off. But these are some pictures from Mount Charleston, specifically Cathedral Rock. Michelle and I went on a hick to kind of explore the area, get some exercise and cool off (Mt Charleston is 30 degrees cooler than in the valley).


This is a picture on the way up to Cathedral Rock. We were both surprised at how much the mountains in the desert look like areas we see at home.

This is a giant root system from a tree that was exposed along the trail.

We finally got on top of Cathedral Rock (elevation 8,600) and we could see the little village that sits at the base. At this point in our journey we also fed the local wildlife (we both know that you're not supposed to feed the wildlife...spare me the lecture) some walnuts. Both chipmunks were extremely grateful.

While we were on top of the rock we could see that a thunderstorm was rolling in. While it was cool to see the lightning and ominous clouds, we thought it best to not dottle. So we headed down. It was sunshiney bright for the remainder of the trek. Oh desert.



More pictures to follow. Now that my camera is out, I will get on the ball.

A

Prepare to be bored.

I think that part of teacher education should include an extended unit on how to survive Professional Development/Staff Meetings/Curriculum Orientation week. Don't get me wrong--I understand the value of these meetings. I don't know everything and each district/state/administrator establishes different expectations, but that doesn't mean that it isn't any less boring.

Today I was orientated to the district's approach to standards. It is strange that I simultaneously feel like I "knew that before" and "haven't ever heard that before" about the presentation. I do know that I really am frustrated by the phrase "It depends on your administrator". So much for getting questions answered. Really, I know it will be OK--my principal is reasonable--but I would feel more comfortable just having all the expectations clearly laid out. We'll see.

I'm scared, excited, apprehensive and other things that I can't but my finger on.

I'm scared about the series of evaluations that we are required to go through. I've never liked failing (read mediocrity/average/acceptable), if I don't over-achieve I haven't done enough. I'm really trying to escape this mental block. I am new at this, I will not be as good as experienced teachers, there are always areas that need improvement. I will need improvement.

As Martha would say, "It's a good thing"

A

Oh I wish I had pictures.

I don't think my dad believes in uploading pictures on Facebook (or really Facebook for that matter) and I really don't believe in taking my camera places. So I shall use words. Perhaps a thousand of them.

I think that's how many it would take.

Over the past seven days I have:

• traveled well over 3,000 miles
• told about 300 people my SSN and birthdate (I even told one group my mother's maiden name)
• dropped $200 at Target (twice)
• signed my name about 600 times
• been in three time zones
• been charged the child's admission rate
• broke down once
• nearly been pulled over (thank you person who was following closely behind me)
• been outside in 115 degree weather

Okay...so these are vague impressions of what I have been up to...Some moments I really feel like I am in over my head. Other moments I feel like I am treading just enough water to keep afloat. This is all to say that although I had a fantastic education, I am an extremely competent teacher (and eager to learn more!) this is difficult. I finally saw my school, met my fellow teachers and administrators--they fit well with me. It will be the most growing year yet which is a definitely good thing, if I stop growing there is something amiss.

Oh yeah. Vegas. The city is poorly planned--the infrastructure is really frustrating (you can't get there from here situations)--and I have yet to see Gil Grissom or any of his staff.

Remind me to tell you about my classroom and why I don't see my students until September 17th. For now, I have to go to bed.

A

the big move

The time is getting closer to the big move and its a little overwhelming. Exciting, but definitely overwhelming. The other day I realized that I have to be responsible for my own birth certificate. While I know that there are many people in the world (some probably less responsible than I) that take care of their own birth certificates, for whatever reason removing it from my parents' possession symbolizes the separation from them.

On Thursday me and my birth certificate (along with a variety of other important documents) leave MN for NV. I wish that I had more profound things to say--but I am so anxious to get everything started. I feel as though I've stalled momentarily while I wait for it all to begin.

So for now I will continue to weed through everything that I own in the world (75% of which is books), buy my car (2006 Pontiac vibe--more later), and say goodbyes.

Bye

A

I webbed you....It means you got the apartment

So I think I failed to mention that on June 19th I became the proud new owner of a Las Vegas apartment. I think that pushes me closer to the term grown-up (although I refuse to completely commit to it as I feel it undermines my elders). It's a pretty sweet place (or so I hear). We have more space than we need including walk in closets and our own bathrooms.

The bummer is that while it is in a safe neighboorhood (why we chose to move there) it is about 30 minutes from Harmon. So we will have interesting drives together. We're not particularly perky morning people and highly talkative afternoon people.

I'm still wondering if I need to get a new cell phone number, I happen to like my area code, but I hate to be the person who confuses anyone asking for my number....

More on this dilemma later.

A

Quite the Opposite

So, I now have something else to report--I accepted a position! I am the newest 5th grade teacher at Harmon Elementary in Las Vegas, Nevada. It was quite the whirlwind tour--multiple offers and much phone tag, let me explain.

I went home for Father's Day weekend, my mom woke me up early Friday morning to answer a call from a principal. She and I proceeded to have ourselves a phone interview (which I have to admit wasn't my best effort--I should have called her back after a cup of coffee) as she was looking for a 5th grade teacher. I hung up with her, quite excited because she dropped all the key words I wanted to hear--collaboration, differentiated instruction, and the centrality of the literacy curriculum. Later that same day, I received a phone call and had another phone interview, this time for a 1st grade position (which I was less thrilled about--I feel uneasy about teaching 1st grade) but at the same school as my roommate, Karen.

I left both conversations with the promise to answer by Monday with a decision having been offered the 1st grade position and waiting to be offered the 5th grade. Monday came a left without a decision--I couldn't get a hold of 5th grade school--but with much grace from the principal at the 1st grade school, I waited. Finally, I got a hold of the 5th grade school and was informed that the position had been filled. Alas!

I felt quite uneasy about 1st grade, I just don't feel called to that grade (yet!). So I had to decline the offer. As I spoke with the principal, he shared that he (unoffically) had a 5th grade position open and "would I like to have that spot?" I think so.

And there you have it. I did accept (he turned in the paperwork before I offically accepted--which, strangely, is comforting). I'm still substantially overwhelmed about having a job. I never felt supremely confident in the offers or my decision making process. I am excited about going to Las Vegas. It will be a fantastically wonderful growing experience for me. I hope to learn more about myself, the calling and purpose for my life and God. My prayer is that I will be able to share God's love with my students, their parents, and my colleagues. I know that I will be exhausted and there will be lots of tears as I make all kinds of discoveries, but if there is one thing that I know, it's that I must be broken to be used by God.

For now,
A

nothing new

So I'm actually starting to sound like a broken record. Whenever I tell people that I am going to Las Vegas but don't know where, a little piece inside me dies. Well, not really. But I am growing ever more annoyed with not having anything new to say.

Karen visited over the weekend and announced that she has been offered (and accepted!) a position with a year-round bilingual school. Now, she has to learn 800 names and another language. She's going out on Saturday to visit the school and also to look at some places.

We have our hearts set on a two-bedroom, two-bath apartment on the NW side of town. It reminds me of the place that Michelle lives in. Both places have lawns between the complexes which is a big bonus for a Midwest gal such as myself. I am really nervous about the climate chnage, but I know that as long as I can see green I will be able to remember the Land of Plenty from which I hail.

I was able to attend end-of-the-year festivities at the school I did my student teaching. When I entered the lunch room I felt like a total celebrity. All of my students and students from the other 4th grade class ran (I told them to walk...) towards me and nearly assaulted me with hugs. I can't imagine not doing this job. I feel like a total bum though, because I totally ate up the attention. I also enjoyed the renewed enthusiasm for teaching and being with a class again.

nothing new for now.

Alison

An Offer of Employment

Monday I received an "Offer of Employment" from the Clark County School District. I was initially confused--this offer came without a school or grade. However, after reading a little more carefully (a strategie I highly recommend) I realized that this offer guaranteed a position within the district. So without a second interview I have a contract to teach.

Woo-Hoo!

There's a part of me though that is extremely flattered (Las Vegas thinks I'm a big deal) and another that's leary (they'll hire without a second interview...wha?). The truth is, it's a job. It's an adventure, which is what I was looking for in the first place. I'm really excited, but I'm also afraid of being disappointed but really the only way to resolve that is to go out there, be awesome, teach some kids and not lose my first paycheck at the slots.